She got the BOOT!!!

So my brother's wife, a lady that I came to adore, went off to Iraq a couple months ago. While there her and my brother got into deeper problems and their relationship was on the rocks. We thought that when she came back all will be well again, but so is not the case. This past week was to be her welcome home party. Plans changed as she was detained at a base in California. We were really anticipating her return, expecting her to come back on the Wed. and it was on Friday that we saw our brother. He informed us that his wife was safely home...since Tuesday...home boy say WHAT!!!!!

So the chick did not have the decency to come see us, she could not even call and let us know she was home. HOW RUDE! I mean the audasity (check my spelling) of some people. Iraq must have really messed with her head. Case in point, or point in case ( I can't remember how the saying goes), before she left she and my grandmother were close, she always came by to check on her if nothing else. When she came back my brother informed her about my grandmother's surgery and she did not even pass by or call....NOTHING.

Now, she has been given the boot from being in my sister's wedding. She was suppose to be the matron of honor. Poor her, I don't even know if she is invited anymore, being that my sister is much more upset than I am. LOL, I have so much anger for her right now, I'd slap her if I got the chance, I mean I'd give her a peice of this newly found musce (thanks to my exercise).

In addition to that, I think I'm upset with my brother. I mean if my boyfriend did not have the decency to come visit my grandmother after surgery he would be catching hell from me morning, noon, and night. I don't think he was pushing the issue, justing letting her be rude to his family. He needs a backbone in my opinion and he needs to take his place as the heaad in the marriage. Just my thoughts, please weigh in if you so desire.


Until next time,

MM

Spring is here!

Yippy! The weather is getting nice nice nice. I can't say hot hot hot as yet but I'm still excited.

It's time to bust out the beautiful colors and the beautiful legs that I call my own. LOL, just kidding. OK, I'm only kidding a little bit.

I'm eyeing somes shoes that I really want for the end of June. My only obstacle is finding the cash to cough up...I'm trying to think of ways to guilt people into buying them for me. Tell me what you think of them.

***My sis has just added another bridesmaid. She's great and we love her.***

***Also, I'm posting on some triffling mess tomorrow. Stay tuned.***

Until next time,

MM

It's ridiculous.

So I come home today and the house is quiet. Now if no one was home I would not have been uneasy, but everyone was home and not a whisper could be heard. OMG!!! Something went down I already knew it.

What could have happened? I left this morning and everything between everyone was all gravy.  But leave it up to my family to get into something within approximately 20 minutes of being around each other.  It's hilarious if you ever get to witness it first hand.

Anywho, this is what happened... My father got in a tissy claiming that my mother caused him constipation.  Yes I said it, constipation.  Now I know you might not care about my father's regularity as of late, but it was the stupidest thing I ever heard and I wanted to share my father's blunder with the world. That's just retarded....he thinks it is because  my mother fed him something he did not ask for.  My ultimate question is, if you did not want it why did you eat, and don't tell me you did not know you were eating it?

The moral of this story, MEN cook your own damn food and stop being a lazy fart. LOL

Love you Daddy!!! ;)))))))))))))))

Until next time,

MM

New Look

Likey the springy looky?

I couldn't find anything else, this was the best I saw.

Until next time, 

MM

Nail crisis!

So my stupid nails keep on breaking.  They grow a little bit then break, what's up with that? I've been drinking nothing but water, I've been eating good, but it seems like they have gotten weaker. Me, oh my! 

Any suggestions out there about a great way/product to help these puppies grow and stay put???

Thanks in advance.

Until next time,

MM

Domesticating the Men!

Now I want to know the honest truth... Is it wrong for me to think that BOTH the women and the men in a household should work toward a common goal - the upkeep of that home?

Without a doubt my house is full of spoiled brats... myself included. I'm not claiming to be a lover of Windex and Canola Oil (lol, cleaning and cooking, I crack myself up) but when I have to get things done better believe they get done.

"MYF, why is it that everyone in your house is spoiled?"

I'll tell you why...it's because we have a wonderful grandmother whose main goal in life was to make sure her family was taken care of and that their worries are kept to a minimum. She cooked, cleaned, did the laundry...practically all the upkeeping. Then it happened...grandma got old. She had a miny stroke and lost the hearing in her left ear, her hip starting acting up, her eye sight got worse, her back starting giving her mucho mucho problems... I mean it got bad and it seemed to happen all at once. Nevertheless, she kept on taking care of the house, even though we tried to tell her to rest and we would pick up the slack. She would just refuse because that's all she was accustom to... well that and watching her soap operas. Then slowly my mother started picking up the cooking and everything was gravy...Grandma would still sweep, tidy up the kitchen, and do the laundry.

Now sad to say, grandma isn't doing anything since she had minor surgery this past weekend and now we have to get things done. Mommy cooked but she never seems to cook enough for everyone so when I went after school yesterday I had to cook. I did not have time to exercise, I did not finish my homework and I did not have time to wash my hair, which is a real bummer because now I feel fat, I'm paranoid about my hair stinking and looking bad and I'm gonna get in trouble when I go to class today...I probably should be studying instead of typing this but oh well...

This all leads up to my point. My father is home on disabilty and he spends most of the day, ...well let's just say he spends most of the day not cooking and cleaning and helping around the house...and we got into a big fight last night. We were going over a plan to get things in motion, get things back to running smoothly. My father proposedthat when my sister and I come home from school we find time to do everything, cooking, cleaning and laundry on top of our spiritual and scholarly activities.

ARE YOU A MAD MAN?!? Must be because partner, there is no way in this lifetime that I will burden myself with sucha thing when there are SEVEN other people in the house to share the responsibilities. I went off on a rant saying that he was home all day--he could take up something--when Mommy comes home from work she will definitely pick up something and there are 3 boys besides my sister and I who could help out here and there with the dishes, the garbage, and little cleaning assignments.

Then my father said exactly what he knew would push me over.."Men aren't suppose to do that kind of work. I am definitely not going to do it. I never have and I'm not starting now, and I'm not raising 3 boys to become faggots, that's stuff that their wives would take care of." OOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!

No you DIDN'T!

So I ask again, Is it wrong for me to think that both the women and the men in a household should work toward a common goal- the upkeep of that home?

I need to low down my pressure, I'm going for a walk. I'll let you guys know what the plan, that is if we ever come up with one.

Until next time,'

MM

Widening Out!!!

How funny is this!?!

Double meanings crack me up (Don't look at me like I'm crazy)...anywho...

For a long time now I've had the same group of friends, really small, tightly knit, really cool group of friends. Now I find myself reaching out to others around me and I'm enjoying it. Now, I'm not going crazy, I'm not the type that you'll find amongst a whole heap of people, but the few people that I chill with now, i'm surprised that I actually like the bigger group.

Now in order to be a friend of mine, there are particular standards that have to be met or are in the process of being met. You have to make me laugh, I mean, I see no reason in hanging with dull people, just a waste of time. On top of that you have to be a very fun-filled person, meaning you like to have fun and when everyone is enjoying themselves you aren't over in the corner sulking for god knows what. You have to be open-minded but not stupid, allowing yourself to be taken over by anything that passes your way. You have to be goal-oriented and working towards a purpose, what's the point in living otherwise. You CANNOT be involving yourself in stupidness, you have to be a stand up person, no shadiness in any aspect of your life (may seem harsh but it's a protection for me and those around me).

Sad to say, I only find myself clinging to Caribbeans. i honestly believe it has nothing to do with the person's character, just something about being comfortable. the way Caribbean people relate towards one another is so different than other nationalities. This is why my 'brother-in-law' had such a hard time feeling as though he fit into the crew when he and my sister first started dating.

Now the point I wanted to make was that, in widening out, I've found a friend that I know will be in my life forever. My beau's brother's girlfriend, E, is so amazing, she fits with us like a glove. Not that she is anything like my sister or myself but she just balances out the whole group dynamic. She isn't as girly as us, but she is definitely more of an acheiver and a go-getter. She encourages us in many ways and we try our best to do likewise. She is too cute, the nicest person you'd ever meet. The funny thing is...we never use to like her. Straight up, we'd bee 10 feet away from her and talking about her with no cares in the world (one of my many flaws...saving for a later post). We'd find the silliest thing to chat about, but now when we're together, you can't seperate us. She is definitely going to be in my wedding, no doubt about it. HORRAY for me, I've got all of my bridesmaids.

So the moral of this story... I dunno, maybe don't judge a book by it's cover. I can't think of anything more original.

On to the other topic at hand.

I find that even though a lot of people are 'commiting' themselves to exercise programs, and 'commiting' themselves to diets, no one is losing weight, and many are widening out, LOL. Now this doesn't pertain to myself nor anyone else that I know personally, but hum hum hum. These girls in my class keep talking about this regimen that they have been sticking with since classes begun in January. It may be me, but I swear that they are bigger then when I first saw them. So crazy. Also there is this girl that talks to me in class (I try not to look her way but she's always trying to get my attention), that said she was on a diet but she look the same. Her clothes fit her the same and her chin, oh boy, don't get me started. It isn't a regular big chin, not the standard double neck, this one is from outer space, that's how much it looks abnormal. I can't quite put my finger on it but it's something.

So what do you think? Is it just me or are people getting bigger on their diets and exercise regimens? My theory is that because they are exercising, I think they feel that they could eat whatever they want. So they end up eating more calories than they are burning....whatcha think?

Until next time,

MM

Update fever!!!

So what's been going on...

Hair update...
The mane is crazy as of right now. My last relaxer was in September. I tried to apply a relaxer at home in November but after 30 seconds tops, I had to wash it out. Talk about scabs that followed. So I'm counting from Sep. and so that makes me 6 months post and I don't plan on relaxing until mid September. My new growth is like 2.5- 3 inches and seeing the curls makes me sort of want to go back natural but I don't think I can handle that project right now. When I get a steady job and I'm able to pay for all the right things to supply my hair with to prevent all sorts of damage then I'll make the commitment. Since Dec/Jan, I've been wearing braidouts. It looks nice most of the time but I'm sort of getting bored and tired, just like I was when I had it straight. I'm just never satisfied with what I have. On the other hand, I have noticed that my hair is stronger, when I comb through it, including the new growth, much less comes out. My ends have not shown any signs of spilting which is a drastic change to what I use to deal with constantly. I have made my own shampoo, using Dr. Bonners soap, water and a variety of oils. It works great. I condition with hairveda's moisturizing conditioner. I prepoo with a peppermint oil and conditioner mixture and it works great for me. My hair retains a lot more moisture and stays cleans for a while, even though I've gotten in the habit of washing every Friday. I'll add pics later of the new growth, and maybe the braidout.

Any reviews...
Nah. I haven't been out much. Money just seems to be scarce, maybe it's the recession. Maybe it's just that my parents have been spending on things instead of sliding the extra cash over this way. Who knows, but I can't complain. They feed me and I have a place to sleep, I should be satisfied. HEHE, if only that were true. I did however go out with friends to hang out at Applebee's. Have you seen the commercial, they have a speacial 2 for $20. Different locations have different selections but the deal isn't half bad. You get an appetizer and two main entrees. Welcome to Cheapo Territory.
Also, my brother has been passing by a lot lately with roti and doubles. If you don't know what that is, I urge you to find a place that sella it and indulge. They are of indian origin, but mostly caribbean indians make it. I really and truly can't explain what it is made out of but you eat it with curry mostly, any kind of curry (that's roti). The doubles are eaten with curry chana, delicious. You must search for a Caribbean place, I'll stick to Trinidadian restuarants and Guyanese. They make it best.

Workout Wednesday...
Yay for me, I've been constant with my workout. Of course, I was not satisfied with the Pilates so I changed to the Crunchless Abs collection. It is great, this is definitely something to stick with during the winter months. My 'mother-in-law' (LOL, that sounds so funny) she is having her own exercise class in the basement, so I'll be supporting her endeavors and also benefiting from the class. I exercise everyday for AT LEAST a half an hour. The results are CRAZY! Even though I'm sore all the time, from pushing myself further, I've lost another 2 pounds (after putting back on 5, sad times). There is a brown skirt that sort of fits snug and I want to be able to fit it like before, sort of hanging at the hips.
I've been drinking plenty water. Overall I may drink juice 1-2 times a week. I still eat a fruit or oatmeal for breakfast and that has been working out for me. If I have a heavy lunch I try to have a light dinner and vice versa. I've cut out cookies, chips, ice cream, and a lot of other junk. It helps with the weight but my main reason for cutting it out was to keep my breakouts under control. Now I need to be on the look out for something that will take away these drak spots that have infested my poor face.

Update on the Wedding...
So my sister has finally come to her senses and found a wedding planner. Even though I love to pick out things and dabble in the wedding arena, I don't have the time to run around and make the actual wedding plans, nor do I have the means, being that I'm procrastinating on getting my liscense. Hopefully by the summer time. Anywho, the wedding planner is like sooooooo great. Everything that we throw out to her, she gets and understands and she loves all of my ideas. How perfect, now my sister's wedding would be my dream come true. That's horrible, LOL.
The bridesmaids have narrowed down styles for the event but it hasn't gone any further than that. We have to go try out dresses to see what really looks good on everyone. We may end up with different styles with similar features. It's gonna be great. The wedding is still a long ways off so we still have a lot of time to narrow down hairstyles, accessories, shoes, and makeup options, being that everything have to look uniformed. We've added a hint of lavender into the color scheme of the wedding and hopefully that adds a little umph to everything.
The guest lists shrinks then grows then shrinks again, I'm waiting for it to grow once more. The location has been changed. the backyard idea went down the drain because it would cost the same amount to change around the backyard as it would to rent outdoor space for the event. So the wedding planner is looking for reasonably priced golf courses and places with beautiful outdoor sections. I'll let you guys know which one I CHOOSE, just kidding, ok I'm only kidding a little bit.

Fashion Fixes...
Ok so definitely look out for the floral theme being incorporated in everything from jeans to evening wear. Though I will advise to add a few items to your wardrobe be careful not to over do it and be discreet in how you interpret the style. This can be a good style gone wrong. Also bright colors, even neons are going to be big big big this season, BE VERY CAREFUL. IT IS NOT FOR EVERYONE, and it definitely doesn't fit into everyone's style. I don't think I'll be partaking in that adventure either.
Shoes, sandals, they are still going to be big with the gladiator look, no doubt about it. Plenty of neutrals are going to be out, plenty earth tones, but also the bright colors are going to make a mark. The platform of course will be here for a while so get use to it and I will advise you to get a pair if you don't already have one. They work great with everything. Day and night looks as well.


So I guess that's basically the long and short of everything. TM kicked me in the rear about my blogging, so here you have it. I'm going to try my hardest to find the time to update very often. I'll put the pics up, tomorrow at the latest. Thanks for reading everyone.

Until next time,

MM

I see him die a little more inside... I don't wanna be a murderer

(words from Rihanna's Unfaithful)

So this is a pretty big topic.

How should one cope with infidelity in a relationship?

Now it is pretty easy to pack up and ship out when you have not invested a lot of time into the relationship. I would encourage breaking off the "romance", or lack there of, if someone was to be unfaithful to their partner at that stage in the game. But when in a relationship for years, even taking it a step further, in a marriage for years, how should one deal with the situation at hand?

Many people that I have come into contact with and others that I know right now have dealt with and are dealing with infidelity in their relationships. Trust has gone out the window but they are in no rush to make moves out the door. No matter how many times the topic comes up, they are never in a rush to completely eliminate the situation from their lives. Why is that? But then again, how could they?

Let's get one thing straight before we go any farther, both man and women cheat. I am not sure if there is, or ever was, a difference in the reason when looking at it as a whole. I think maybe every case is different and everyone who does cheat has their own "legitimate reasons" for doing the do.

Anywho, what would be your advice to someone who is caught up in this perdicament?

If there is forgiveness then I suppose forgeting should follow. It wouldn't be fair in my opinion to tell someone you forgive them for their transgression but still bring it up and throw it back in their face time after time. It's just like putting a bandage on an open wound and ripping it off every now and again. That wound is bound to remain open until further notice.

I know this is easier said than done. Even though I haven't dealt with infidelity in my relationship, things have happened that I have forgiven but it seems almost impossible to forget. Every now and then, I may bring it up or pass a comment about it and I know what I'm doing isn't benefiting anyone, I just can't keep it inside. Questions come up, thoughts come up, images come up and I'm stuck on replay for the entire day. The only way that I can catch a break is to rehash the dirt and stir up old feelings.

Your yes should mean yes when you agree to forgive someone, but forgetting is a pain in the rear end for me, simply because I have a good memory.

I ask myself all the time, concerning those who deal with extramarital affairs, how are you holding on to your sanity and remaining in the relationship? I think that I would be the most nagging, unreasonable, untrusting person, if I were to go through that experience. Never in a million years would I be able to forgive nevertheless forget. It must take strong will and a desire for the other person to remain in a relationship where your emotional stability is always on trembling waters. Sleepless nights, troublesome days, I declare right now, I will go insane. I would not be able to face that problem everyday for the rest of my life. Everytime I look at the person I feel that I will be reminded of what happened and sink back into sadness.

I know everyone would deal with it differently. some may jus t brush it off and go on as if nothing happened. My hat comes off to those soliders out there, who stick with the relationship and never bring up the destructive past. Kudos to you, for sure.

As a side note, I have a question. If you were related to someone who was cheating on their spouse, would you tell on that person, expose them and deal with the hurt feelings later, or will you wait until the spouse catches up with what is going on and pretend that you had no idea? Alittle tricky, I know.


*****This post may be a little all over the place, it's just that there is so much going on right now around me. *****



Until next time,

Meandering Memorandum