Thursday, November 26, 2009

You remember BRACEFACE?

The summer I was going into sixth grade my mom took me and my sister out for "a drive". We loved going places with my mother, we always ended up buying something and then getting something to eat. What child wouldn't love that?! This day my mother was acting all secretive about where we were headed but being greedy little children, we tagged along anyway. When I realized we were going east on the Conduit heading for Long Island, I was nudging my sister mad hard, like YEAHHHH, we about to go somewhere nice. I was getting so excited that I had to start asking my mother some more questions, only this time she decided to answer (she had already trapped us). So I ask if we really are heading to Long Island and she says yes and I wink at my sister because I told her we were going some place nice (Long Island equated nice things when I was little...I know better now). So then after some other questions I ask her if she could finally tell us where we were going and she says to the dentist. Whoa, whoa, whoa--shorty hold up, rewind and come again selector. First off, our dentist is in Brooklyn on Flatbush, second, say whattttt???? You bring us all the way to Long Island to go to the dentist? We better be getting something really nice after this.

Then she lays the bomb on us...we were going to a "special dentist" to get braces. As soon as those words left her mouth tears started rolling down my face. I knew my teeth were messed up but WHY....boys still liked me and so I did not see the need to get braces. Plus I was going into a new school come September and I didn't want to have that junk in my mouth. How cruel could she be? I never knew anyone who had braces but those joints looked like they hurt. Metal in your mouth couldn't end well for you, or at least that was what I was thinking. So after the melt down that my sister later took part in, we pull up to this banging office somewhere in LI. We go in and everyone is so nice to us. We go take pictures of our jacked up teeth and without wasting time those suckers were put on our teeth.

For three whole years I had braces, all my years in JHS which undoubtedly meant countless wise cracks and jokes at my expense but the boys were still after me, hehe. I could never lose my touch. All my pics from then were donned with the wire from hell. I tried hard but I could never keep my mouth closed. Soon enough (or not!) May 2003 came and my braces went. I was sooooooooo happy. My teeth were perfect...not white...but still perfect. I went into high school without braces and took on the roll of braces bully. Anyone with braces, I made it a point to let them know I had them but LUCKILY they came off before my high school years started. Now they were to be remembered with braces in their mouths when people thought of them. So sad.

But I guess I should not have spoken so soon because now my teeth are shifting back out of place. It is very minor but I notice it and that is what truly matters. My sister's wedding is in six months and I don't want jacked up teeth all over again. Oh no siree bob! So I brought the proposal to my mother that I should put the braces back on, to rectify the situation before it gets out of hand. I thought it was brilliant, well of course I did because it was my idea. But without sparing a moment, Mommy up and jumps at me like "what is wrong with you girl" and blah blah blah "your teeth are fine" and blah blah blah "our insurance won't cover you because you are over 18" (I knew it would suck to get old) and blah blah blah. How about that? That sucks to the fifteenth power. Now I'm stuck with messed up teeth and no way to fix them.

It's ok you can feel sorry for me. I won't blame you. I'm gonna go cry now.

Until next time, (serously, I'm gonna cry)



KG said...

i always wanted braces! i thought they looked cool haha

Product Junkie Diva said...

I'm sure it's in your head, your teeth are just fine. If you mom didn't notice anything crazy going on it's perfect!